Chapter 9


TL: Akabane


***


I hadn't seen that name on the Sakura Romance website for a while, since the day I called her two weeks ago. Then suddenly last night, there was a release about her. Everyone thought it must be news of her return.


But it was not.


--It was an announcement that Aimi Momoka had left the group.


I couldn't believe my eyes. I had assumed that she would be active for a while, so I had removed this development from my mind.


These days, the term "graduation" has become the most common way to describe the departure of a member of a member idol group. I didn't think anything of it, but it's odd when I think about it. It is no different from leaving a group.


But - to describe it as "leaving" is to raise the concern of fans that there might have been some kind of scandal on the part of the members. It makes fans worry about the possibility of some misconduct on the part of the members. It is not a wrong expression, but because the media and the public have glorified it as "graduation," it could lead to a strange misunderstanding.


As if to explain this, the release stated.


[The reason why we have called it a "graduation" is because of her own strong will. She is aware that her decline in motivation for her own activities is an act of betrayal to her fans...]


No, that's not true. At the very least, Momo-chan gave me courage, inspiration, and the will to live. So I wanted to give her a grand send-off, but she said she would not even hold a graduation concert.


However, I heard that Momo-chan will hold a handshake session for fan club members. It was her wish to create an opportunity to talk directly with her fans.


I am honestly glad to hear that. As a fan, I can't get my feelings straight if she just disappears like this. She has the right to express her feelings one last time and put an end to her life as a Momo-fans. I believe that no one will verbally abuse or insult her.


But I still wanted to see Momo-chan singing and dancing at the end. That was my true feeling.


I was alone in the smoking area of the company, exhaling smoke. I felt that my longing for her was contained in the smoke.


Looking at the internet news, they say pretty much whatever they want." Smoke without fire," and "She deserved it." In the comments defending her, I also find slanderous remarks against her.


One person holds his tongue. Only these people are not really interested. They just want to put other people down. Whether it's on the Internet or not, there are no good people who make fun of others.


Momo-chan - or rather, Miina Yamamoto. It makes me feel like a regular person all at once, but it's still a pretty name. She will probably drop the name Aimi Momoka and live as Yamamoto from now on.


Speaking of which, there has been some movement in her back account, Blue Rose. She had been silent for a while, but before long she began to make a few remarks.


But they were not of much substance. I don't even remember what she said.


I know her, but the rest of the world doesn't. I'm sure she can't complain about her job, even though it's in the back account.


There are accounts that don't connect with anyone and just complain. But after all, there is a desire for people to listen to one's stress. I am sure she is the same. Complaining without anyone listening is a lonely thing.


(Yamamoto......?)


I wonder if there are any fans in Japan who know Momoka Aimi's contact information. Just thinking about it makes me feel guilty.


If I wanted to talk to her, I could take action. But I can't find the courage to do so.


I put out my cigarette and think for a while.


If I leave the smoking area, I have to go back to work. I'm not in the mood for that right now. I don't care if people say I'm not a good member of society.


The last handshake session is in two weeks. I applied for the ticket as soon as it was released. It's a trick I can do now that I can do anything I want electronically.


That would be the end of my life as an idol otaku. I will not be promoting another member of Sakura Romance now. It wasn't like I was a boxed-in fan.


So I'm going to tell her what's on my mind. ......Why it sounds like a confession? No way.


My smartphone trembled.


I was a little surprised because I had it in my chest pocket. I looked at it and saw it was a short message from an unfamiliar number.


[Hello. Did you see the release?]


It was Yamamoto. I checked my phone history to be sure, but the number was correct. I had forgotten to register. Or rather, it is more appropriate to say that I had been thinking about whether it would be appropriate to register the number, and had been careless about it.


I wonder what I am to her. It seems too far to call her a friend, and too close to apologize for getting her involved in the press.


In any case, we need to keep a certain distance. To protect her from various allegations. I have to be firm.


[Yes. I saw it. I'm shocked that she left so soon.]


I felt it was not good to ignore it. So I put my honest feelings into words. I've gotten pretty good at flick typing. For someone like me of the "Galapagos" generation.


The reply came immediately. will you stay at home I light another cigarette. I don't mind. I don't want to take a break from work.


[The response from the office is natural.]


Is that true...? What she said on the phone the other day may well be true. A new song that didn't suit Momoka Aimi became a buzz, and her significance of existence disappeared.


I don't know if that is really true. Even if it is, it's not a problem I can do anything about.


I couldn't taste the cigarette, just like any other day. That's funny, because I did just now.


The latest contact apps have a "read" feature. I really wish they would stop this. It's a hassle to read the messages in the first place. That's why people say, "I don't want to be with someone I don't like."


I miss the days when I used to exchange emails with girls I liked. I remember how many times I used to "inquire" about her. I was thinking about just a few lines of text.


[Will you come over next time?]


Times have changed. The reason why I can post this kind of message is because the means of communication has become more like chatting. Nowadays, it is rare to communicate by e-mail.


But still, a sales e-mail from an idol herself. I couldn't help but laugh. Momo-chan may know the contact information of many people, but I don't. It would ruin my image. It would ruin my image of her, but I am experiencing it myself. The possibility is not zero.


As for her question, of course yes. Of course I would go. But I think that would be boring. I've only had serious exchanges with Momo-chan, but let's change things up a bit.


[What if I don't go?]


It's just a little prank. When I think about it, I was taking it very seriously.


I was just doing what a human being should do, but now that it was coming to an end, I felt like it was okay to joke around a little.


I finished my second cigarette and exhaled a single breath. As if to let out the little bit of smoke that was left. I doubt anyone here right now thinks I'm in touch with Aimi Momoka.


On the day of the handshake, I'll wear the suit she likes. A clean suit that doesn't have the smell of cigarettes on it. A peach-colored tie wouldn't hurt either.


I'll have to bring a bag that doesn't look like a weekly. It's hard to get caught in a quandary at the venue.


Last event. What will I think about when it's over? Well, ...... is fine. I'll think about it after it's over. It's not like I'm in a hurry to live.


When I was about to leave the smoking area, I felt someone call out to me. So my body froze, a little nervous. When I looked down at her, I saw that she was smiling at me.


"I'll be waiting for you. Araki-san!"


This thumping in my chest was due to the shaking of my phone.



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