Chapter 43
TL: Akabane
***
Although it was a spur of the moment act, I don't think it was a very good idea. Pushing aside Miya-san's reluctance, I fled to a room near the entrance with my shoes in hand. I decided that even if I ran out of the room now, it was inevitable that I would run into her.
As I closed the door and caught my breath, I heard her enter the house. I turn off my attention and wait for her to pass by. With the sound of her passing through the hallway, I have a little more time to myself.
I feel really bad about opening a room in someone's house without permission. When she leaves, I'm going to bow down to Miya-san as much as I can.
Even if I do that, I can't see her now. If I see her, I will never. With my feelings.
(.........Workroom?)
If it were a bedroom, it would be quintessentially awkward, but this room is closer to the atmosphere of what is commonly called a study. It is a dark room, even in the daytime, because the lights are not on. It was a place where that much sunlight did not come in.
The color of the desk was also unknown. On it seems to be a white laptop computer. Around it, many books were crammed into the shelves, giving the room a solemn feeling.
In addition, there is an electronic keyboard beside it. She must have a lot of hobbies. What a woman!
Anyway, let's not stare at her too closely. All I have to do now is to sit here and wait for Yamamoto-san to leave. I hope she'll leave as soon as possible.
While I was thinking about that, I heard footsteps echoing in the hallway again. They echoed so loudly that I held my breath even more. I put on my shoes.
I thought, "Okay, I've successfully fooled her." but then Miya-san stopped her.
"Here, this is for you."
I was surprised. That phrase, it must have been a coat. I must have offered her that paper bag right here, right now. But I wondered if I would be able to hear their conversation if the doorway was so close.
I felt like I shouldn't listen to ...... but I couldn't take my ears off their conversation.
"Why.....?"
The voice I heard through the door. The voice of that girl I hadn't heard in a very long time. It's beautiful, cute, and tickles my heart gently.
But she is more trembling than I have known her in a long time, and I feel a little sad. Of course, I know that I am at least somewhat responsible for this.
"Araki-san......"
I felt a grip on my chest, but it was only for a moment. She didn't notice me, but she noticed that I brought it to her.
Oh, it hurts. Not just my chest, my whole body is numb. The feeling of being grabbed was not for a moment, but has probably been there ever since we met.
Her shoulders are shaking. I didn't see it visually. I could only guess from the sound of her voice.
Anyway, I had no choice but to endure it with all my strength. How much easier it would be if I could jump out and wrap her in my arms. But I don't have the courage of a light novel protagonist.
(...............Ah)
I just endure, endure and endure.
It was only for a few dozen seconds, but during that time I was repeatedly hit by the oncoming wind of emotion. I knew that if I moved even one step, I would collapse. So I crossed my legs and held both knees with my hands, as if they were attached to the ground.
If I didn't do that, my body would have seriously moved. Against my will, my instinct was to protect her.
Reason was desperately trying to convince me. I wanted to see her on the stage again. That's right. That's why I've drawn the line at being in a relationship with her.
No, really. From the moment we became friends, I knew this would happen someday. I didn't think too much about it at the time. I thought it would just be a matter of me stepping aside. But - it's not that simple.
So get out of this place, quickly, quickly....
"...............You're a wimp!"
That's right. I'm a wimp. I could have detached myself from these feelings if she'd just humiliated me more, but she didn't say anything more. Instead, she no longer has any intention of covering up her overflowing emotions.
I feel like I'm about to lose my mind. I wonder if I should let her go on like this, even if I have to push myself to the limit. If I don't stop her here, I will regret it for the rest of my life.
No.
That's just my ego.
I know that. That's why I didn't even try to hide my messed up face.
I let out as many tears as I could, almost sobbing as much as she did. She was right there. I couldn't fool her anymore about my true feelings that were overflowing, even though she might find out.
Suddenly, the door opened. With force. The light shining into this room was so bright that I couldn't help but turn my face away.
"--Won't you go after her?"
It was Miya-san. With the word "Eh?" leaked out, I looked at the front door. No one was there, and it was after she had left.
Miya-san didn't smile when she saw my mangled face. On the contrary, I think she is looking at me with a little pity. And those words. It was a direct denial of what she had said so far.
".........I'm sure you'll catch up with her."
"Huh?"
"And hugged her."
"Yes."
She doesn't get angry at such a true statement. I was prepared for at least one sarcastic comment, but it wasn't like that at all. It would have been easier if she had just cursed at me. Why does she look at me with such a serious face only at times like this?
"Here. She forgot to receive it after all."
"......"
"What do you do now?"
I put the paper bag in front of me. Matching it, she sits down on the floor as I do. By being at eye level, I felt a little less oppressed.
Back to the story, it seems that Yamamoto-san left without accepting the sore after all. In conclusion, my plan had failed. We were back to square one.
No, I am sure now. As Miya-san said, if I catch up with her, I may be able to make it in time.
"You heard it, didn't you? That girl's voice."
I did.
"There's nothing I can do."
Why?
"You're all I have left."
I wasn't qualified to say that was an exaggeration.
Miya-san's expression was the weakest I have ever seen on her face. Perhaps it was because she, too, was worried about Miina Yamamoto that she was so preoccupied with this current situation.
And it became blatantly obvious. It became clear that Goro Araki was the source of all this.
I am not asked to take responsibility. I just felt like I was being asked to break out of this situation. I was the one who was involved in the situation, but as I interacted with her, I found myself becoming the one who was emotionally involved.
".........I'll do it."
I was blown away by the fact that she cried all the way through. I don't want to see her like that again, so I'll take a little risk rather than let that happen. The existence of Kanako Miya was preventing me from doing so, but I'm sure she'll shut up about it now.
"......Thank you."
"No, no. That's......"
"Hmm?"
"I'm sorry for the inconvenience."
I stood up and bowed to her. Originally, I was going to apologize for entering her room without permission. But this apology was much more than that. It was an apology for many things.
"Fufu. Not a problem at all."
As if she understood what that meant. I heard her smile, which gave me some relief. I went straight to the front door with my shoes and paper bag. There was a faint, lingering scent of her.
I put on my shoes and caught my breath. She must not have gone that far yet. Even if I couldn't meet up with her, I would call or do whatever I could to see her.
It's not that reason is fighting me. I'm sure there's a little part of me that still thinks I shouldn't do it. But the reason I don't is because my heart has already been consumed by my true feelings.
No, I simply regret it. I had a feeling that if I let this moment pass, I would never be able to contact her again.
"Araki."
"Yes?"
"It's good to hold your heart."
If I could do that, I wouldn't be here right now. When I said that, Miya-san laughed. The biggest smile I've ever seen.
Winter sky. A few clouds are watching me. The blue sky, which will soon be tinted with sunset, probably knows where she is right now.
I'm going to see you now.
0 Comments